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Have The Talk encourages families to tackle tough, often-avoided topics such as teen driving, health issues and retirement planning by providing tips and advice on how to "have the talk."

My Dad is 87, always very active, very independent and still lives by himself. My Mom died in '94. He only uses eyedrops for glaucoma, no other medical conditions. But, his eyes aren't good anymore and he is still driving. He is frail, compared to a few years ago and shouldn't be driving. But, when I try to talk to him about it, he looses it and hurts my feelings or I hurt his. I'm the only daughter and the baby and he and I have always been very, very close.
He has run up on curbs, busted tires, knocked his mirrors off on the mailboxes on his street but no serious wrecks, yet. I loose sleep over it and am afraid I'll get the call that he has had a serious wreck everytime the phone rings. He lives about 100 mi. from me and not close enough for me to keep a close check on him. He walks a mile or two everyday, lives close to town and loves it. I live 20 mi. from town and he says he can't handle being this far out in the woods. Got to be close to walmart where he can walk and see people.
I don't expect anyone to give me the perfect answer, there isn't one, but I know there are many of us boomers who are going through the exact same thing. It's a hard position to be in and I love my Dad so much, it breaks my heart. I'm now the parent.

THIS IS A GREAT COUNTRY.BUT OUR GOVERMENT STINK.I NO AS A WAR VET. THEY DON'T TAKE GOOD CARE OF THESE VET.WE GO OF TO WAR , COME BACK NOT THE SAME PERSON.I WAS 100 % DISABLE.THEY CUT ME BACK TO 20%.NOW THEY WENT BACK TO 30%.
I DON'T WENT TO BE SICK,WITHOUT MY GOD i COULN'T MAKE IT.HAD CANCER FRM AGENT ORANGE,SUGAR, PTSD.I FELL GREAT, THANK GOD.MAYBE THAT MY PROBLEM, EVERY TIME I GO 4 A CHECK , I TELL THEM THAT.THEY SHOULD TREAT US BETTER.

Hi there -- just posted on the "invasion of the boomerangs." view link

What are your thoughts? How can parents and children successfully talk about the issues that arise in a boomerang relationship? What’s worked in your family situation? What hasn’t?

Ah, parents and children. Define children. Define parent.

We've tried over the years to redefine ourselves as adult children of our parents. Some of us are the so-called "sandwich generation" - kids at home and parents needing our support. Some of us are fortunate or unfortunate depending on point of view to have parents, adult children, grand children and even great grand children.

How do we handle the different roles we play? Parent one moment. Adult child the next. Taxi driver and bank account. Teenagers who act like kids and then act like mature adults.

Those are some of the questions that require "that talk" but few of us are ready or willing to talk.

One should not wait till Mom and Dad are on the other side of the hill.
My name is phyllis and I have six grown children,I started letting my family know my wants and what would make me more comfortable in my
final days,had it put in my will so changes would be nearly impossible.
All of the family feels better knowing the burden is off them. By the way I should have told you I'm 74 yrs old,with copd but not down and out.One more thing I let the kids list the keepsakes they wanted,this
helped.Hope this helps.
Best to you all,Phyllis

my 16 year old grandaughter has been dating afellow for 8 mo.he is 17. last week he shoved her so hard she hit the ground and sprained her wrist and ankle. police arrested him .now she forgives him and we dont know how to convince her he may do more harm next time.he is supposed to stay 100 ft. away and he has but now the order will be off next week how do you convince a teen in love he may have an ongoing habit that is not healthy to her. he had one visit to counciling so how to help the situation? im scared for the both of them. mom is a wreck im close to that. ive been down that road years ago. we dont want her sneaking around to see him but.....

I was looking for a group to ask some pretty serious questions about teen boys and the problems that rise up while raising them pretty much alone. One is in MI and has a lot of problems with drugs and alcohol. The other is here in KY with me and is pretty much a good guy and just a hormonal moody 16 year old! I think. You see, we moved here to get away from my 19 year old and all of the problems that come with his addictions. I felt this was best for my youngest at the time. Now, guilt has set in badly. My neighbor who is/was 24, just died of Hodgekins? and it really made me do some soul searching. I guess I feel like my oldest has been wasting his life away since he was like 13, and this poor guy has been fighting for his at least that long. My son is sitting in jail again, for the umpteenth time for something totally stupid and this guy lost his fight. It just really hurt me to think that I didn't instill anything in my kid to make him try harder, U know? Every one keeps telling me to stop beating myself up, but hey, he is my son, and I just can't! I don't want to see him die because of the damn drugs or jail. It just all pisses me off so much. I really have no idea why I wrote this or what I expect anyone to write back, I guess I just needed to get it all off my chest. Thank you for letting me do this.

I have been divorced and lost a wife to breast cancer.
My question to the group is have you ever noticed how former seemingly close friends and relatives seem to leave you and remain out of your life when these events occur. They seem to promise that they will be there for you. But, puff, they they go as well. My question is what do you do? Do you confront them and say something and what do you say, or just leave it all behind you and go one? Do you think that this occurs more frequently with men or women?
I am interested in your oppinions on this matter. I can not figure it out as to why they are there for you for a long period of your life and quickly abandon you.