Viewing details of messages, sorted by time of last reply
Sticky Message
Well alrighty then!
I have opened the group to the public. There are new guidelines and we'll see what happened.
A husband asks: Why do you weep and snuffle over a TV program and the imaginary sadness of people you have never met?
Wife: For the same reason you scream and yell when a man you don’t know makes a touchdown.
A man solves the problem of too many visiting relatives. He borrowed money from the rich ones and loaned it to the poor ones. Now none of them come back.
Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years.
He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased you can hear again."
To which the gentleman said, "Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will five times!"
Wife: For the same reason you scream and yell when a man you don’t know makes a touchdown.
A man solves the problem of too many visiting relatives. He borrowed money from the rich ones and loaned it to the poor ones. Now none of them come back.
Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years.
He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased you can hear again."
To which the gentleman said, "Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will five times!"
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'
See more in 1st reply.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'
See more in 1st reply.
Never raise your hands to your kids
It leaves your groin unprotected.
I 'm not into working out.
My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
________________________________________ _____
I am in shape. Round's a shape!
________________________________________ ____
I'm desperately trying to figure out why
kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
It leaves your groin unprotected.
I 'm not into working out.
My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
________________________________________ _____
I am in shape. Round's a shape!
________________________________________ ____
I'm desperately trying to figure out why
kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
This advice from one who knows:
It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell.
Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became necessary for Martha to get a full-time job both for extra income and for health insurance benefits that we need. She was a trained nurse when we met thirty some years ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical center. It was shortly after she started working at this job that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age.
See first reply for more
It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell.
Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became necessary for Martha to get a full-time job both for extra income and for health insurance benefits that we need. She was a trained nurse when we met thirty some years ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical center. It was shortly after she started working at this job that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age.
See first reply for more
A son asked his father, 'Dad, will you take part in a marathon with me?'
The father who, despite having a heart condition, says 'Yes'. They went on to complete the marathon together.
Father and son went on to join other marathons, the father always saying 'Yes' to his son's request of going through the race together.
One day, the son asked his father, 'Dad, let's join the Ironman together.' To which, his father said 'Yes' to.
For those who didn't know, Ironman is the toughest triathlon ever. The race encompasses three endurance events of a 2.4 mile (3.86 kilometer) ocean swim, followed by a 112 mile (180.2 kilometer) bike ride, and ending with a 26.2 mile (42.195 kilometer) marathon along the coast of the Big Island of Hawaii .
Father and son went on to complete the race together. View this father and son run:
view link
Please welcome Mechelle, I know her from another group and she has a wicked sense of humor.
I know I haven't posted much here lately but I have been reading your posts and keeping my eye on yos guys.
I know I haven't posted much here lately but I have been reading your posts and keeping my eye on yos guys.
I went to get my hair trimmed today and there was a lady there who looked like she was in her late 70s. I guess it was her daughter and grandson with her. The lady was sitting in the chair getting her hair rolled and the little boy yelled Hey Grandma why dont you just put it on the head on your dresser like you do all the time.
apparently grandma was getting her wig set on her head.
I couldnt help but snicker. And pray one day that isnt me.
apparently grandma was getting her wig set on her head.
I couldnt help but snicker. And pray one day that isnt me.
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT : Mac?
COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou .
ABBOTT : Your computer?
COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT : Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou .
More in first reply
COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT : Mac?
COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou .
ABBOTT : Your computer?
COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT : Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou .
More in first reply
