I'd like to wish everyone here a very Happy and Prosperous New Year. I can't tell you how very glad I am to have my parents here to see the first African-American President of the United States. My Dad, who will be 90 this year, has lived in Washington, DC all of his life. He's seen a lot of change - and UNCHANGE! My mother, 83, was born in Birmingham, AL, with the KKK "night-riding" past her family home. I'm so blessed to have them both still with me. January 20th will be great day for them, the country, and the world!

Good luck to everyone in 2009!

Ladies, I am coming up on the 10th anniversary of my husband's murder on June 25th and I am having a hard time. We are still waiting for adjudication on the case. A suspect was just indicted in January, then they let him escape until last month. Now we are waiting for him to be arraigned! The DA says that "might" be sometime in September. To formally charge someone with a crime?! That will put the trial back til sometime next year.

We can't wait that long. My kids and I are sick of Georgia and its poor justice system when it comes to "JUST US". We've stayed here this long, waiting for a trial which should have taken place 10 years ago. We were making plans to leave this year, but now everything got pushed back due to the "accidental escape".

I am having a real hard time with this. I am working hard to protect my children from the fall out from this. I did all of the news interviews so that they wouldn't have to. But this is becoming a nightmare that never ends.

I haven't been to sleep in the past two days because I don't want the 25th to get here any quicker than it does. Father's Day was bad enough for us but then, right after "Cheaters", "Soul Train" ran an episode with my husband's band Con Funk Shun! A mere coincidence, but very painful.

I am normally a very strong person but this is beating me down. I am thinking about starting a group here for families of victims of violent crimes but that might just give me another way to focus or ruminate on this issue. What do you think?

I would like to share with my sisters my grief behind the recent killing of a college friend of mine and DivaBird's. His name was Robert Dixon and he was a filmmaker. He was shot during a hotel robbery while in Nigeria last month.
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This is particularly distressing for me because Bob was killed in a similar manner that my husband was killed in 1997. Our family is coming up on the 10th anniversary of Louis' death so Bob's murder is quite a blow. His wife had to fight the diplomatic bureaucracy to get Bob's cremains back to the states in time for his memorial service tomorrow (June 14).

DivaBird and Bob were very good friends, both coming from Long Island to Howard University, where I met them both in 1968.

It would be nice if you would go to the Newsday site and sign the family Guestbook. view link Bird and I made our entries on Page 1. Even though you didn't know him, but for the grace of God goes anyone of us. I know how quickly a loved one can be taken. It would give his widow, mother and family solace knowing that others feel the outrage from unnecessary violence, both here and abroad. Show your love for another human being. Show your support for another victim's family.

Thank you,

Linda Lou

For you old school fans of Con Funk Shun, I want you to know that the suspect killer of the band's drummer and founder has been recaptured and is finally in jail in Georgia after almost a decade. If you go to view link and find the headline "Accused Killer Back Behind Bars After Accidental Jail Release", you will see the Fox-5 Atlanta news interview that I did last night (Thursday, May 3, 2007). I have fought hard to get justice for my late husband and, hopefully, this case will finally get its day in court.

I'd like to thank everyone here who has given me their prayers and support these past few months. For all of you who are fans of Con Funk Shun, I would like you to know that the suspected killer of my husband, the band's founder and drummer, has been recaptured by the FBI. Hopefully, after a 10 year wait, we will finally have some sense of justice. Also, please check out the May 7, 2007 “Most Beautiful People” issue, page 116, fold out the inner page and there I am on the Dove Pro Age ad! And go to view link and click on my picture to read the great essay submitted by my children. My photo is on the #3 page (this link should direct you right to it). I am in the left hand column, fourth from the top.

That was a ray of light in a year which started off good with an indictment in my husband's case but which quickly went bad again with an escape that could have been prevented by Georgia law enforcement. Believe me when I say that "Justice delayed is truly justice denied". Families really can't get on with the business of life until the judicial process is finished.

Thanks again to Mr. J. and all of the group members who reached out personally and helped me through a very bad period in my life.

Linda Lou

Eons suggested that I share this with the group members. I just got a call late yesterday from "People" magazine telling me that I am a winner of the Dove ProAge “Most Beautiful Over 50 Contest.” My picture will be featured in a Dove pro age advertisement in the “World’s Most Beautiful Issue” of PEOPLE Magazine! (May 7, 2007)! It will be on the stands on April 28, 2007.

I am so excited! I have never missed a single issue of the magazine since 1977. I always said that I would be in that magazine, even if I had to kill somebody!

This is honor is a testament to ALL of us. We are ALL "Beautiful People Over 50". You know that I will be representing my girls of SGN but I will also be representing this group. I look at everyone's pictures here and we all look good FOR ANY AGE!

AA+50 RULES!!

I came back to this group because I love it so! A great place for fellowship and a real sense of community. If we can't stand together, then we will never stand for anything. Let's endeavor to keep this group about real issues that we can ALL relate to. I like being able to come here, day or night, to get a little moral support when I feel almost crushed by the stressors of the world. And often I can get that that boost from just reading the positive and uplifting stories that you share here. I don't post here as much as I could because I find more from just listening to wise words of others.

This should not be a personal sounding board or individual weblog - it should be about issues that we, as African-American, suffer through and overcome every single day of our lives.

While the majority of us may not be from Africa, we are still of Africa. We are Americans, one of only two other peoples who are the real product of this continent. Embrace that and make it work.

We are a mighty race, chosen for our beauty, grace, strength, and intelligence. Although we did not choose to be here, this nation was built from our blood, sweat, and tears. The country was suckled at the breasts of our women. Our men broke their backs and calloused their hands building homes and roads, picking crops, and leading plows. Our magnificent blood lines may have been diluted through rape and torture. But we survived. We were brought here for the wrong reasons but we were never a mistake. God doesn't make mistakes. He made US. And he did so in his own image. Wow! Aren't we majestic?! Ain't He so good?

It's been hard but I ain't mad. That was then and this is now. I am proud to be a café-au-lait mother of mighty, mighty millenium children. Let's be positive and role models for our descendants. Who better to teach them how to be the very best that they can be. I'm not leaving that job to the US Army - it hasn't been around as long as MY PEOPLE!

Thank you, Mr. J, for giving us this forum, this community, this place for US. I can say with 100% certainty that the painful personal journey that I'm on right now would have been so much harder if not for the people here and my sisters of the SGN (and you know who you are, Divas!) I am proud and humbled to be among you all. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

No author or copyright tag needed. These are not someone else's words, from another time. These are words from MY heart, spontaneously, meant for my people here. Can you feel me? I know that you do!

PS - If any of you would like to get a really basic pointers on HTML coding - to put a little "English" on our posts, with color, and emphasis, etc.), just PM me. I don't want to clutter up Mr. J's group with something that may not interest everyone. But if you are interested, I would be glad to help. Why use a pencil when we can have a box of Crayolas? :-)

FINALLY - I love Mr. Jersey's new suggestion about adding our photos. I think that's a great way to really learn about each other. Just keep it real - no "Glamour Shots" taken a decade ago but claiming that it is recent. Can we keep it real for this community? I'd love to see baby pix and recent ones of us strutting our bad selves. Just because we qualify for the Senior Citizens Discount at Denny's for "The Grand Slam Breakfast" now doesn't mean we aren't as still fine as hell! Let's see some of those "disco" shots and our "Angela Davis 'Fro" pix from the late 60s and early 70s. Brothers, if you've got a doo-rag processsed pic, let's see it. Nothing to be ashamed of - that was the sign of the times. We were blessed to grow up during several colorful decades. I know I have at least 1000+ photos from back in the day of not only myself and my late husband's band, but of Sly Stone, Jimi Hendrix, the O'Jays, Delfonics, Isaac Hayes, and "pre-grits" Al Green! We need Eons to give each group a "Photo Album". I will make that suggestion first thing Monday morning, along with the moderator having the control to choose a "Feature Photo of the Week". (We might be able to do the latter in our blog posts).

That's all for now!

(I had to repost this because the site keeps "glitching", causing typos - something that I hate! I checked this a kazillion times before I published it and it still left out a key word: LUPUS!)

Father Of 5, I'd like to commend you on your insightful analysis of "Analogies", which can be often likened to stereotypes. That is something that I avoid when it comes to my Black man. I don't think any of you are dogs. Mainly for the same reasons that you set forth. "Canus domesticus" are loyal to you for life. But both men and women do not have that same capacity. In addition, dogs are loyal to a "master". There is no such relationship between a man and woman. Not if it is to be healthy.

Now I love Black men. I have never dated out of my race. It has nothing to do with prejudice - it's merely a preference, like I don't date women. ALL black men would have to be dead before I considered another alternative - and that might be a Black WOMAN!

I always leave my relationships on good terms. You will never see me sitting with my girlfriends taking about "Joe was damn dog. I don't see how I stayed with his ass for two years." Well, whatever he was when I left him was the same thing he was when I met him. People just don't change completely when they are grown. If he gave me a beeper number when I first met him, then I should have known that he had a woman and he doesn't want me calling his house. Oh, I knew it - but I decided to be "Stuck On Stupid", choosing not to acknowledge the "SOS Alert". If he cheated on his present mate to be with me, then how can I be pissed at him when he does the same to me later in our "relationship"?

I love my Black man. I don't care if he's on the bus stop when I met him. If he's going to work, that's good enough for me. I have TWO cars so I'm not looking for a ride. But if he can fix my toilet or cut my grass, I can fry him some catfish with potato salad and fresh collards. When he comes in from working in the yard, he can sit on the sofa and I will put a TV tray table in front of him, fix his plate, open his Corona, and hand him the remote control.

I love my Black man. He doesn't have to wear a white shirt to work just because I'm an executive. He can wear overalls with his name stitched on them. As long as he treats me like his queen, he will be my king. And who am I to look down on a man who works with his hands? My Daddy became a janitor at Howard University because the employees students could attend tuition-free.

I love my Black man. If he doesn't like his job, I will use my resources to help him start a business that is more suited to his personality. If he is serious about this project, he will have my full cooperation. I will type his letters, prepare his marketing strategies, and design his website. All he has to do is be passionate about succeeding.

I don't have a lot of expectations for my man. After all, I'm not perfect. I don't have the right to tell anyone how to live their lives. All I ask is that he love me, be honest, and respect me. Those character traits encompass all that I can and should expect from my man.

How can one compare a human being to a dog, or a wolf or a dingo? I've got three dogs and none of them remind of any man that I have every known. And I only keep certain breeds around me. A dingo has too much "wild" still in him - I wouldn't have one in my house anymore that I would have a pitbull. As for a wolf, well, I have carried the wolf in my body ever since my late 20s. The Latin word for wolf is "LUPUS". That is nothing to play with as far as I am concerned. One should never take terms so lightly - you never know how a word impacts another. And to disrespect any man would be to disrespect my father who I am blessed to stilll have with me at age 88, my three brothers, my late husband, my late infant son, and more importantly, my son, who is in his 20s and for whom my work is not done. To have him hear me refer to a man as an animal could subliminally change how he sees himself. I want him to continue to respect young women of all races.

So, to all of my Black Brothers, I will call you by your name. Or I will call you "Lover", "Baby", "Sweetheart", "Honey", or even "Boo". But I will never call you a "Dog", or any variation on the theme if it is demeaning to you. Why?

I LOVE MY BLACK MEN!

I don't know why I have so much trouble with my posts. My HTML gets jumbled and I have a million typos AFTER running a spell-check program. Thanks to Marty ("DayDreamin'"), I discovered that my like here is not working.

Let's try again: view link

I will contact Eons Tech Support about this if it doesn't take this time. I checked it and it worked when I Previewed it before posting.

Thanks for your patience.

Please check out our blog on an unsolved murder which has devastated my family. My husband was killed in a home-invasion robbery in 1997. He was the founder and drummer of a popular recording group signed to Mercury Records in the 70s and 80s. His music is still being released today on "Greatest Hits" compilations.

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One of my LifeDreams is to get a resolution for the sake of my children. Please put us in your prayers.

Thank you.