Mature Interracial Romance

I wish I could help you, but I haven't actually encountered that particular problem. From an outsider's vantage point, it seems to me there is a lot of rivalry and envy going on with them. Some of our other members may be able to lend you a helping hand.

Strength, peace and love,

Wanda

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Sounds to me that what you are experiencing more than anything else is just plain bad manners. I think if you have done the best you can to extend yourself and this is what you have gotten in return then you need to be clear with your partner that being in the relationship does not mean you will tolerate being disrespected.

Stop attending family gatherings or putting yourself in social settings where you will be made to feel uncomfortable and gradually find a place where you and your partner can start building your own family, one based on love and mutual respect. The world is not going backward, it is moving forward and in the end you will both have a wealth of experiences, advice and perspective to share with your children.

Joyous

I think that if this happened, my partner, if he loved me, would speak to his family members about their rudeness. He would want to keep me safe and not allow anyone to disrespect me. Some families, no matter if it is an interraccial siuation or not are just not open to "outsiders".It speaks to their own insecurities, But, I would not attend any family functions when I knew someone was trying deliberately to hurt my feelings.

I agree. Being able to talk about extended family and other social situations that are impacted or effect our interracial relationships should be an important part of this group. I haven't been keeping up with this group very much because we don't seem to get him to the 'meat' of our interracial relationship lives as much as I'd hoped this group would.

I thought I had a great relationship with Karen's extended family-- and I still believe that it was very good most of the time. However, after Karen passed away on February 3, that all went out the window. Karen's wishes were completely ignored in terms of not having a funeral and having her body donated to the medical school so they could study the causes and effects of her Addison's disease. Likewise, my attempts to advocate Karen's position were completely ignored, and I ended up leaving and returning to my hometown because the situation clearly was not fixable.

Most of the social issues related to our being an interracial couple were generally of the humorous variety actually. There was things like being in the grocery checkout together, and the checker assuming we were not together. In another previous interracial relationship, I once went out to dinner with my son's mother and I went to a restaurant more than once, and we were asked about our reservations separately. LOL

Let's get into more of these issues and make this group would truly could be... rob

I think that if it was me~something would be said about the conduct of my family.

It is difficult to make folks change their mindsets and beliefs. For some people that is not going to happen. It is a fact of life and it is what it is.

But, I also believe that if the person is someone that I care about on any level, then it is up to me to help my family understand that relationship. I don't need their approval of what I am doing. I do need for them to act like they are mindful of my feelings and other person's involved.

I don't know if this is a helpful response or not. I am from a large bi-racial family and I know from experience that there just comes a time when you have to speak up and set folks straight.

Ben and I really haven't had that problem with family. I love his family, especially his mother and sisters, and they have always been very welcoming. My sister and her family love Ben. In fact, marrying Ben is the only thing I've ever done that my teenage niece thought was "cool". We have had problems with just a few neighbors, and even with online buddies, who are friendly and welcoming until they realize we're a mixed couple. But who needs friends like that anyway?

Good question. I'm the matriarch of a large extended family -eight grandkids and, so far, three great-grands; one of my daughter's kids is Inupiat, two, white, and one black; my son's first two children have a Puerto Rican mother, and the two younger are half Chinese. I can assure you no one in my family would even consider such an attitude, and if they did, they would be in for an ass-whipping. As far as a partner's family, I can't imagine that I would become interested in someone who came from such a family; I just don't see it happening - your family shapes you to some extent although I must confess that my own mother was as prejudiced as - well, just prejudiced. However, when it came down to me as an adult bringing home a rather large black man, she showed manners.

I hear you loud and clear. I am from a mixed background also.

I have an interracial family, There were no problems w/ me and his brothers. One of the bro. wife tolerated her and soon stopped visiting us.

My family we all are terrific as a complete family. My sons called her "sis"

Yes, on both side of the family my sis and one of her cousins had a problem. which stayed theirs. My interracial family is great. If one have problems they must deal w/ it. but they will not put distance between my family and me. She,my sons wife is close to us.I loved over 18 years and will continued.