Hi all, I'm in the preproduction/production phase of making a video about what it is to be an HSP. I need your help. I have some questions. Your answers will help guide me in this project. Please answer from your heart and intuition - the intellect can detach one's self from the reality of experience. Please answer only for yourself. (This is research, and will not be on video itself.) Thanks. Here are the questions:
1. What do you want the world to know about your experience as an HSP? 2. Would changes would you like to see happen? 3. Do you have Highly Sensitive Children? 4. What are your strengths as an HSP? 5. What are your challenges as an HSP? 6. What other comments would you like to make about your HSP experience?
#1/ I am not only not much different from you, I may be You! With all the talk about getting connected with the "Inner You", it is still not popular in Mainstream! Being "Touchy/Feelie is seen as Homo Phobic! Scares the Hell out of people! #2 Let "Guys" know that it is OK to cry at Chick Films! #3Un-Married! #4 I really do feel "Your Pain!" I really Know what you are feeling! #5 Being a "Man" does not mean that you can not have "Feelings"! So many think a "Guy"/"Man" can not let the World know how he feels! #6 I think I feel Life as no "Ordinary" man can. I pity them! Art
Ah, Art. All you said is close to my heart. This project will deal a whole lot with what men experience - why it may well be tougher for them than for women as HSPs. Thanks so much for the input. Shari p.s. I deleted an earlier response of mine because of a spelling mistake. I really should preview my posts more!
Hi Shari, I'd like the world to appreciate how much it needs HSPs, too often we are labelled as being 'too sensitive' but it's that level of sensitivity that enables us to help someone when they can't find the words. We get dismissed and regarded as weak when in fact it is an advantage with a downside but it's us who suffer the downside, the world actually benefits.
I'd like to see HSPs acknowledged and incorporated into any groups they may join out in the real world so there are quiet rooms for reflection and recharging our batteries. It would be good if the existence of HSPs could be more widely accepted and appreciated.
I don't have children at all but can recognise the signs of HSP in children I know.
My strengths as a HSP are ones I've built up through protecting myself as a HSP. I try to completely avoid negativity so have learned to be strong enough to stand still and not bend when others are trying to break me. I have found it easier to stand still than retaliate.
My challenges as a HSP are simply to spread the word and try to get others to understand what it means and how they may be one too. More directly it's a challenge to get out there each day and deal with everything a new minute can bring with it. There are such a lot of minutes in a day that bring things to be dealt with.
Only other comment is that there should be more places like this group where we can come and share our experiences and feel less of an outsider.
Hi Owly1, These are great comments. Wouldn't it be great if every group saw to it that at least one HSP was included and valued? Yes, we do have to connect with each other more - not only for our own sake, but because the world needs us. Work in progress . . . Thanks very much for your insights and thoughts. Shari
You're welcome Shari. I've seen HSPs being made to leave places through the lack of consideration and appreciation of both the condition if I can call it that or the HSPs depth of thought or sensitivity.
Hardnosed thoughtless individuals with very limited perception seem to believe they have automatic rights to be everywhere to say and do whatever they please without any regard for anyone else.
To my mind it is these people who have the real problems.
I sometimes try to imagine what it must be like to be one of those people and the world seems very simple and limited. We experience a multicoloured world a bit like a prism whereas they seem to just operate in a very beige world. Everything seems so simple to them and anything not beige stands out. Then it's down to their character I guess as to how they tolerate or react to whatever has dared to stand out.
Hi Owly1, I sure feel the pain coming through your words. We need to find ways to help others learn about us in a safe, gentle way, so that kind of pain isn't generating more of the same. I'm reminded of the old story from Aesop's Fables: The Wind and the Sun once made a bet about which one could make a traveler's cloak come off the fastest. Guess who won? Shari
#1: I am not anti-social. I absorb so much of what it is going on around me that I often times need to withdraw in order not be overwhelmed, especially with negative energy. #2: I would like for more people to be senstivie to "sensitives." I've alway been told "grow a thicker skin" while growing up. That's impossible for an empath. #3. Yes, my daughter is highly sensitive but she is uncomfortable with it and often feels that the rest of the world is against her. #4. My strengths are my ability to put myself in another's shoes and to feel things from their perspective, being able to accurately size up a situation or a person immediatley, and my empathy toward people and animals. I am often the one people come to when they need to make a difficult decision, so I guess wisdom would be thrown in there. #5. My main challenge is trying not to absorb negative energy. It makes me ill. And another very difficult situation for me is when I know what people are thinking about even if they don't verbalize it. I am also so sensitive that I cannot watch anything on television that is violent or dark and I am horrified by the treatment of pets and animals by some people. #6. Overall I enjoy being a sensitive, but it has some very unique challenges. I believe it our calling to try to spread the word for peace and harmony and to prepare people for the tough times that are coming in 2010 - 2014.
Thanks for your comments Goddess! I'm sorry I couldn't get back to you faster - I've been busy at workshops, doing interviews, etc. Only now have I caught up on my sleep. I don't sleep well when I know I have an early morning schedule. I just want to get going, and can't relax enough to sleep the night before. I had a sleep-challenged time for about two weeks. But life is now sane again for me.
I really appreciate you taking the time to answer so completely. I so totally get about "growing a thicker skin". What skin? I have a sister who tells me I am too sensitive and introspective. Uh huh. To my mind, she is not sensitive or introspective enough - very hard to tell her that, and it doesn't make sense anyway. It's a little like asking someone to appreciate the the colors of the rainbow when they are color blind to the reds and greens. Not their fault, and nothing to be done. The rainbow seems normal to both of us, but what different sights they are.
Of course, the analogy is flawed. Color blindness is a pathology, while being non-HSP is considered the norm. It describes the majority of people. Our minority (20% of the population) potentially balances the boldness and risk-taking of the majority with our caution, intuition and sensitivity. The HSP trait is neutral, and thought to exist in order to help the survival of the species. Both HSPs and non-HSPs are needed, but we have to step forward and get people aware of who we are and what the HSP trait is all about. How can we expect to be of service to the highest good if there is no awareness of what we have to offer? Much as we don't want to, we have to step up to the plate, before it's too late.
I'll get off my soap box now. I can get very passionate about this!
1. I would want the world to know that HSPs can truly be an asset to any environment, and that their high sensitivity is a gift. 2. I would like to remind others of the concept of gentleness, and introduce them to the notion of unconditional positive regard of one another. 3. I do have highly sensitive children, and inasmuch as I did not identify HSP back then, I did encourage them to take care of themselves in highly stressful situations, i.e. removing themselves from a chaotic environment in order to regroup and recenter themselves - anything that would empower them to acknowledge, honor and feel, and then take care of themselves. 4. Empathy is a powerful strength. Compassion is another, and the ability to listen and respond quietly and nonjudgementally. Sensitivity within myself is what allows me to be sensitive to others. 5. I have always considered it a challenge to not have to explain why I am removing myself from a situation (usually to escape loud noise, or to calm down if things are chaotic). Sometimes it is difficult to self-monitor in the midst of chaos, lots of people, or loud noise and thus I can become overstimulated without knowing it until it's too late. Then the challenge becomes calming down and finding my 'center' again. It takes longer to calm down if I have been overstimualted to the point of having to make an exit in order to survive. 6. I am just now beginning to understand my childrens' high sensitivity through the process of gaining a better perspective of my own. One child has suffered what appears to be mental illness and his HSP trait has emerged as a possible need that hs not been addressed. This has taxed my own HSP needs insofar as being a mother who tries to be aware and address her children's needs goes....I am learning to use intellect over emotion - I can feel whatever I need to feel, but what I do about it must be thought about rationally. I have learned to take better care of myself through his illness.
