I'm currently takeing care of both, it saddens me to know I'm loseing my wife but yet it is such a joy most of the time. It certainly is another chapter in our life & I feel a closeness that I'm sure would never have surfaced if not for her A D. I find it so much easier to care for her than my Mom, even though in some ways needs more hands on help ( advanced COPD & heart issues ).
I know what you are saying...I think especially if you had a good marriage, there is a level on intimacy with a spouse that you will reach that I never had before my husband got ill.
I think when it is a spouse, you have to deal with your friends a lot more and how they react to the illness. I had friends that wanted to be friends with me and not him after the dementia...it was strange.
I know what you mean HG. It isn't just Dementia that chases them away. I think people feel awkward around the sick, especially when they know there is no hope. They don't know what to say so they avoid us. I wish there was some way of helping people understand that their friendship is very important and needed.
I know what your saying SpiritSeeker, the people that I worked with for years are dropping like flies and I cannot seem to visit them. I feel that I must be lacking something because going to see a terminally ill friend is too much for me. If you ever find the words please let me know what they are. In the last week I have lost a long time friend and never made it out to see him in the hospice.
I have resolved to work on this.
I have always felt that I can do anything for a short time...it has gotten me through some wicked dental appointments. That is the mindset I have when I visit dying friends.
It might just be me but dementia taught me that there are things worse than death.
I always bring a small something...book or magazine...candy if they can have it...
