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I am happy that we have been able to help you through your first year of grief. It was also a blurr at time for me also. This group has helped so many. We are all here for each other. Keep helping your friends who have lost their loved ones this year. With your guidence they will get through. There were five of us in a grief group that are now very close friends. We go to dinner once a week and are there for each other when we get blue. I hope you can have that same companionship with your friends. Keep thinking of the good times you had with your husband. It will help you get through the anniversary of his passing. I wish you a peaceful day. Hugs.....Sue

The first year just seems to pass while we are in a haze and out of step with time. I am so glad you come here and find comfort. The people here are so compassionate and understanding and know exactly what each of us here is enduring. May your holidays be warm and tender.
Love Ya, Lyn

yea where all the time went... my oldest son passed away 11 years ago on november18th.. plan on going to his grave and then if the weather permits, i will just walk around the cementry...

My first year went by in a haze. It was three years for me in February. This group helped me come to terms with my new reality and provided much needed comfort and a place to belong during some very difficult times. Like you, I gained strength from the friends I made here and have been able to help others. I wish you well as you guide your friends through their ordeal.

I am approaching ten months. That is a very good way to express what this group is - "a place to belong during some very difficult times". This group has helped so much to make me feel normal and has provided much comfort and guidance. It's good to hear from others who may look at things in a different way.

Motherbird, I wish you a peaceful anniversary with happy memories. I'm so sorry for your friends. I'm sure you will be able to help them through their roughest moments even though you are still on the journey yourself. Hugs, Deb

A friend of mine said to me on the anniversary of Ann's passing that she was amazed at how fast the year passed -- I agreed with her, but it seemed like a funny comment for her to make. Then my brother said the same thing in an email and followed it up with that he can't believe she's gone (he's known her as long as I have, in fact there was a little competition for a short time at the beginning).

Motherbird, I too am glad you come here and find some solace and understanding. I'm just at 19 months, and find the waters still somewhat rough. The first year was spent in getting things "done." Now I am searching for my new normal.
This group has been a safe and caring place for me to come. I always find that I am never alone. I hope you will continue to post. Anything you say will help someone.
hugs...marty

Time got all warped and wrinkled last November 21st for me.
Yes, it does seem like a quick blurr some days. I have this internal clock that says,
he was doing this last year this time, he was doing that.
But in another way, it's been agonizingly long.
Each thing I do alone seems to take so much energy to learn anew.
But Motherbird, keep reading and posting with us, this is a good place to heal.

Opalwhyne, The one thing I can say about the first year passing is that you can not longer think - this time last year we did so and so. I found that a mental relief,obviously the events leading up to and the day itself, and the time after - whoops - there I go again, but the actual this time last year we did x,y,z together does fade after the year. I find I can remember much happier times and smile now.

I also feel a little guilty as the more deaths I hear about (and I don't mean personal to me) actually helps me soldier on - I think it's because I have become more accepting of my loss - and that it is an absolute common occurrence, I observe people in the early stages of grief (from a distance because usually they are not known to me and have their own support) and I'm beginning to be thankful that my horror has happened, and now I'm just waiting for my name to be called.

I found myself the other day wondering if Richard was fully occupied in heaven, and also that he will enjoy his time there, filling in his time well waiting for me. We were such a match that I just know we'll meet again. I STILL am glad that he did not have to live without me - that may sound conceited but I would not want him to hurt the way I do. Having said that I hope he is not hurting in Heaven - but that is meant to be a kind place so I'm sure God will be looking after him. Take good care and just drift thro' the 21st anticipation definitely is much harder than the actual day- thinking of you Jeanette xx

So true! I'd hate to think of him having to go through this!
Some people say our thoughts are just that - wishful thinking but both my daughter and I
both had the feeling that when he died, he went places.
We both feel like he comes to check on us then goes off. He loved to travel.
I think our loved ones are busy with the things they wanted to do, without any pain, but still check on us.
I can't prove it but we both feel this so strongly!
That gives me comfort, knowing he's traveling around light as a feather, whenever he wants, checking in on us every once in a while.