What if?

Message 154 of 1736

I was watching one of my favorite shows (naturally) which featured a teenage girl who was strangled and left for dead by her high school teacher. What's even more appalling is that this pathetic excuse for a man went to a hoedown immediately afterwards and then proceeded to text several girls whom he allegedly had had sexual relations with (yes - they all attended the same school).

This young girl fought back, miraculously survived, but had to endure painstaking therapy just to learn how to speak again. Evidently the pressure on her throat as a result of the strangulation caused oxygen to cease reaching a certain part of her brain, hence the need for therapy.

Amazingly, the community was divided once this man was charged, arrested and later convicted. If he was as innocent as he proclaimed, why on earth would he attempt suicide? Sounds like a pretty damn guilty conscience to me.

My question to the parents in this group is if your son committed such a horrible offense, what do you think your reaction would be? Could you still love your child despite him nearly murdering another human being? The mother of the man was showing the reporter letters from prison which sounded like (in her words) "the boy I always knew and still love". Well, this "boy" grew up to be a man who most certainly got sidetracked and is (in my opinion) exactly where he needs to be - serving a 20 year sentence for attempted murder.

Your thoughts?

posted by GlamDiva57

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If he is guilty then he needs to be where he is. If I was his mother I hope I would still love him for the son he once was, and maybe can be again after he has done his time. We can forgive as mothers much that others may not be able to. That does not mean that you condone the behaviour and should sympathize with the girl and her family. People loose their way sometimes and I believe that a family should always be there for that person to help them find their way back if its possible. To love the unloveable is hard to do, but we must try.

posted by Espirit
22 days ago

As a mother I will always love my children no matter what they do. This woman's son is in prison and that's the right place for him. I wouldn't, even if I could, deny his mother the right to love and support him.

posted by merlinsflame
22 days ago

As a mother of a murdered child I sat in a courtroom facing my child's murderer and forgave him for what he did. So I'm sure I would be able to do the same for my child. I would be very unhappy with him as I am with anyone taking an innocent life. But a Mother's heart is for the most part a very forgiving one.

posted by ladywrite2
22 days ago

DANG!!! The SOB only got 20 years???? And if he's a "good boy" in prison he could be out in half that time or less? Save the date, you women with daughters! This butcher could be out sooner than you think. Sure, his mama will be happy to have him back. But her joy might be at YOUR or your daughter's/grandaughter's expense.

posted by citygal226
22 days ago

Violent rapists and murderers, as this guy could well have been had the girl died we are not adequately dealing with in our justice system. The guy in Cleveland who raped a woman, the one they found so far the remains of 11 other women he killed in just the few years since he 'served his time', 'paid his debt to society,' obviously should never have been let out. He served 15 years for violent rape, got out just a few years ago and has racked up 11 more victims to their families despair.

We are not dealing with the sociopathic violent criminals properly at all.

posted by GothamGal
22 days ago

The man who murdered my daughter was given 20 years and walked free in 12. Sometimes our justice systems seems to pick and choose which life is worth a life sentence and which ones are worth only a slap to the hand. There is somethign wrong with the justice system for sure.

posted by ladywrite2
22 days ago

Between their Jr & Sr yrs in HS my boys went to NCCJ summer camp. (They promote racial, religious, all kinds of tolerance). In a discussion about parental support and the law. O told the group: "If i did something illegal, Mom would turn me in and turn over any evidence she had. She would still love me, visit me, encourage me to get counseling for whatever caused me to do it. But she would not protect me or let it slide anyway, anyhow." He was/is right.

i brought them up knowing my love is unconditional, but my approval is not. i can love you with out condoning every thing you do. And certain behaviors are just plain unacceptable.

posted by feywon
22 days ago

I would love my son no matter what but if he did anything to break the law, I would expect him to be punished and if he did something hideous, I would be looking long and hard at myself. But sometimes parents are not to blame and sometimes they are.

posted by Pamela4
22 days ago

Do you believe that violent people are born or become violent because of the way they were raised? I believe they can become violent genetically or environmentally. What do you think?

posted by ladywrite2
22 days ago

Both maybe...but as a retired social worker I have seen horrific child abuse among some of my young clients..and I am not talking about spanking either...I mean horrific abuse...I had one client who was locked in a totally dark room, no light at all for hours at a time and when his dad took him out he put the child in the trunk of the car and he beat him so badly, he broke his bones. I have never seen such a scared human being as this young man...I wound not be surprised if he grew up to be a sociopath. This child haunts me to this day...and I have seen other horrific cases....terrible.....I think that some sociopaths, like maybe Jeffrey Dahlmer might have had a genetic predisposition to being a sociopath. I had another case where the foster parents adopted I think it was four members of a family and then put those kids in cages and beat the heck out of them and abused them emotionally. I got the case after the abuse had been found out. One girl came out of it ok but the other 3 children were in really bad emotional shape. This was a famous case in Florida. I often wonder if these kids grew up to be ok.

posted by Pamela4
22 days ago

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