Selling My Soul..............
10/25/09......to the devil is what it feels like to me, when my legal counsel told me they wanted me to shave my beard, and have my hair cut, and wear different kinds of clothes, as a strategy to win a bigger settlement. I hadn't cut my hair since 1970, and my beloved late wife Teri especially loved my hair long and my face with beard. I was her mountain man she always said, as she was always amazed at how I could hunt, and track, and trap animals and game; and then prepare the meat, and tan the hides for leather, or prepare the furs and skins for usefulness and clothing. She loved to make cloaks and bed covers to feel the sensual qualities of the furs, as we made love on them through all our romantic years........
..................Anyway, my lawyers said the wanted me to appear less militant, outlawish, and hippyish, describing how they wish me to be dressed for the hearings and trial. The want me to wear more colorful clothes, rather then just my subdued black military pants,and my black Tee-shirts and black leather jacket. And they don't want me to wear the jewelry I always do, that is made by my old friend DWB with the rocks and gemstones I collect, and the silver feather he made that I wear in my left ear lobe, and the silver "Eagle" ring my Teri gave me as a gift in 94', and the little silver and black hills gold ring I gave to my wife on our tenth wedding anniversary, that she was wearing when she died in my arms, that I have since worn on my little right finger.......
..................I asked the one lawyer if she wanted me to look like John Denver, to which she laughed, and then said yes. So now I look different then I have for almost forty years. My late wife wouldn't recognize me it feels, as I hardly recognize myself, and it feels as if I am selling my soul to the devil, and all for money. It doesn't feel like this should be how justice is done over the third party liability that caused my P.I., and my wife's wrongful death. We were the victims, not not the predator.Yet I have allowed myself to be manipulated all in the name of money, in lieu of real justice...........
..................Anyway, my lawyers said the wanted me to appear less militant, outlawish, and hippyish, describing how they wish me to be dressed for the hearings and trial. The want me to wear more colorful clothes, rather then just my subdued black military pants,and my black Tee-shirts and black leather jacket. And they don't want me to wear the jewelry I always do, that is made by my old friend DWB with the rocks and gemstones I collect, and the silver feather he made that I wear in my left ear lobe, and the silver "Eagle" ring my Teri gave me as a gift in 94', and the little silver and black hills gold ring I gave to my wife on our tenth wedding anniversary, that she was wearing when she died in my arms, that I have since worn on my little right finger.......
..................I asked the one lawyer if she wanted me to look like John Denver, to which she laughed, and then said yes. So now I look different then I have for almost forty years. My late wife wouldn't recognize me it feels, as I hardly recognize myself, and it feels as if I am selling my soul to the devil, and all for money. It doesn't feel like this should be how justice is done over the third party liability that caused my P.I., and my wife's wrongful death. We were the victims, not not the predator.Yet I have allowed myself to be manipulated all in the name of money, in lieu of real justice...........
