Message 44 of 170

The Inner Critic

A couple of quotes that came in my email today about the Inner Critic

“We tell ourselves so many lies and half-truths ... We listen and are duly impressed by these inner voices that turn into unseen judges that nag at us. We give each of these judges a seat of honor in our minds, all the while hating their guts and their never-ending supply of judgements ... We give the judges permission to accompany us on each journey of life, never daring to realize that we can park them, at least momentarily.”
-- Eloise Ristad

“The Inner Critic makes each of us a child. As we become the child in our relationships, we lose our sense of self. We are no longer self-contained, self-respecting adults. We look to others for validation. Our self-worth is based upon their opinion of us. Thus, everyone around us becomes a mother or a father whose support and approval is desperately needed to protect us from the constant criticism of the Inner Critic.”
-- Hal and Sidra Stone
BarbInBend's profile
Replies 1 - 10 of 13
Barb these are good and the last one especially speaks to me. Trusting ourselves and our own opinion has so much value...listening to our own knowing voice. wished I could always do it. although I do get better at it with time.
starrybright's profile

about 1 month ago
About a year ago I was standing in line at the Dollar Tree store, and this skeletal faced ghoulie was looking back at me. I bought her and hung her in the hallway just outside the door to my art room. I designated her as my inner critic and she is left outside the door when I go in to be creative. She still bugs me in many ways, but it helps to give her the brush off when I go in to do art :)
BarbInBend's profile

about 1 month ago
One thing that helps me to not be self-criitcal in my art (and in life) is to remember that it is about process not product. The product is the bonus -- and a chace to learn from the process used. Rumi said "our beyond ideas of right and wrong there is a field -- I'll meet you there"
Sometimes people ask - "What is the favorite thing you have made?" -- my answer always seems to be "The one I'm working on right now!" (in this instance a mask)
elsiemarley's profile

about 1 month ago
My inner critic is just someone else to argue with. Takes the pressure off The bear.
so far....IC is winning this arguement. with time limitations of late with other commitments I keep forgetting about the fun part!
bluspider's profile

about 1 month ago
I've recently become a real fan of Elizabeth Gilbert's writing. I read "Eat, Pray, Love" first ... it's a touching and funny memoir of her struggles with some of these types of things, the struggle to find out what it is one really wants to do, and to go ahead and do it. Here's a short video of her talking with other women about the book. I highly recommend it. It was a very enjoyable, inspiring and timely book for me to read.









I've passed "Eat, Pray, Love" on to another Eons member, and I just finished reading another of her books, "The Last American Man", about the life of Eustace Conway. I totally enjoyed that book, too, and now my boyfriend is reading it. Here's a web site I found when I googled Eustace Conway:

view link

and a quote from the front page:

Eustace is a veteran of an active life following Nike's motto of "Just do it"! Eustace camped alone for a week in the mountains at age twelve, living off the land and loving it! At age seventeen, he moved outside to live in an Indian tipi, which was his only home for 17 winters. For years he wore only homemade buckskin clothes and made and gathered his implements.

Eustace ideally works towards peace on earth through a bottom-line program of understanding and respecting the people and environment that governs the quality of our lives. As an educator, he loves to uphold Emerson's quote, "What you do stands above you and shouts so loudly, I can't
hear what you are saying."
BarbInBend's profile

about 1 month ago
Currently reading Shakti Gawain's "Living in the Light" and just came across some more helpful stuff about another part of the psyche that I have a lot of trouble with ... the inner rebel.

"What you have, then, is the tyrant and the rebel doing battle within you. One part of you says get a job, the other part says no; one part says you better do something with your life and the other part grows lethargic. Neither the tyrant nor the rebel are listening to or protecting you anymore. They have taken on their own personalities and are working in reaction to each other. When this happens, people feel stuck. Energy cannot move in a situation where two parts of yourself are doing battle and you are not dropping into your intuition for guidance."

No wonder I am so good at standing in my own way ...
BarbInBend's profile

about 1 month ago
The Inner critic?? Hee, Hee,Hee! I've told everyone in my life as I've said to self, "Never take me for granted." I really don't know what Leo will do and Virgo are analyzing Rosa she should do.

I'm not too critical of myself or others. It seems I prefers to allow critical people say what they may and continued to do the best I can with what I have to work with. LOL
Augrose109's profile

about 1 month ago
That is a good attitude, Rosa, and is another thing I've learned about letting go of guilt (all those inner "shoulda-woulda-coulda" thoughts) ... I did the best I could at the time with what I knew.
I can choose to let go and move on.
BarbInBend's profile

about 1 month ago
I keep movin on BARB, BUT the ole IC is hanging on my tail.
I mean need a surgeon to get this thing off my butt!
bluspider's profile

about 1 month ago
Lots of things you can try ... one of the ones I like is to write a conversation between you and IC like

IC: Nobody is going to like that, why bother?
me: It could give me pleasure and that's why I will create it. Other people don't have to like it.

IC: You aren't going to get anywhere
me: I can take one step today.

etc ... every time one of those negative thoughts comes up, counter it with a positive one ...

If you keep doing this, it works (better than doing nothing as IC would like!)
BarbInBend's profile

about 1 month ago
Replies 1 - 10 of 13