Sexual Changes With Age
After reading a lot of the postings I thought I'm make a general response. First of all I am NOT a psychologist or marriage therapist. I do have a Master's degree and will keep up my research. From what I have learned (I am 56), these are some important points to consider.
Sex drive will change with age. Part if it is mental, and part is physical. As we get in poorer shape we will limit our performance sexually. There are also hormonal changes. Men should have their testosterone checked. If it's low then it can be elevated by medicine very easily. But we are also affected by many medications. Viagra, Cialis, etc. can help and sometimes have to be taken a few times to see how they will work. The daily Cialis is pretty good. Women, of course you need to be aware of your hormonal changes!
There is a big difference between males and females in spite of the feminist assertion that we're the same. We are not. Read THe Female Brain by Dr. Louann Brizendine. Shes a psychiatrist with lots of experience. The information is pretty much available from other texts, but she puts it together well with good illustrations and you don't have to be a doctor to understand. This book is an easy read. Women, maybe you will be able understand why we're not like your female friends. Men, it may scare the crap out of you. I would recommend it for everyone.
Then there is the Mars/Venus book. Yes it means reading for you guys. But as you understand you wife more, the better the relationship and it MAY lead to better sex. Women, we are hard wired differently than you are! Yes, you need to understand us! There is no guarantee about improving things since it will depend on how much your husband or wife cares about your needs. If you have animosity between you and can't resolve that, there is little hope for improved sex!
Relationships take work! By the time we hit our 50s our neurons have been trained to fire together in certan patterns. It is hard to change that, but possible! It takes work on both sides. Improving your relationship is possible, but it does not happen by accident.
If you find you have a sticking point you can't resolve, then maybe a good counselor will be able to help. It's amazing what a third party can see that you can't! But notice that I said a GOOD counselor. If you don't like the person, move on.
I will quit there, but this is a complex subject with few quick fixes. However, isn't the reward worth the work?
Sex drive will change with age. Part if it is mental, and part is physical. As we get in poorer shape we will limit our performance sexually. There are also hormonal changes. Men should have their testosterone checked. If it's low then it can be elevated by medicine very easily. But we are also affected by many medications. Viagra, Cialis, etc. can help and sometimes have to be taken a few times to see how they will work. The daily Cialis is pretty good. Women, of course you need to be aware of your hormonal changes!
There is a big difference between males and females in spite of the feminist assertion that we're the same. We are not. Read THe Female Brain by Dr. Louann Brizendine. Shes a psychiatrist with lots of experience. The information is pretty much available from other texts, but she puts it together well with good illustrations and you don't have to be a doctor to understand. This book is an easy read. Women, maybe you will be able understand why we're not like your female friends. Men, it may scare the crap out of you. I would recommend it for everyone.
Then there is the Mars/Venus book. Yes it means reading for you guys. But as you understand you wife more, the better the relationship and it MAY lead to better sex. Women, we are hard wired differently than you are! Yes, you need to understand us! There is no guarantee about improving things since it will depend on how much your husband or wife cares about your needs. If you have animosity between you and can't resolve that, there is little hope for improved sex!
Relationships take work! By the time we hit our 50s our neurons have been trained to fire together in certan patterns. It is hard to change that, but possible! It takes work on both sides. Improving your relationship is possible, but it does not happen by accident.
If you find you have a sticking point you can't resolve, then maybe a good counselor will be able to help. It's amazing what a third party can see that you can't! But notice that I said a GOOD counselor. If you don't like the person, move on.
I will quit there, but this is a complex subject with few quick fixes. However, isn't the reward worth the work?
