Hello Alismom..!! Sorry to hear the problems with your daughter.I'am not qualified to say much about this subject,but I can give you some support.It must really be rough on you as a mother,your daughter must have some deep emotions that are bothering her and needs to get some good help.I wish you well and hope every thing goes well for you.You are a Special Lady and I hope someone really treats you like one.
G.R.
having been a psychotherapis for aboput 45 yrsand having lost a son to similar problems I have much empathy for your struggles. your child is making her own choices and those choices are not you're doing . and there are limits as to what therapy can accomplish. I wish I had a better answer to thesituation mShe will have to find her own way out of this mess good luck and all the best you need to do what is best for you Peter
Thanks so much for your kind reply. It's been very hard for me keeping the problem to myself, so even the act of sharing the story with others is freeing and relieves some of the stress. I try to remember that I was (am) a good mother and that Ali's choices are her own. It broke my heart a couple of days ago when she refused rehab AGAIN even though her wealthy grandfather has offered to foot the bills to help her get her life back on track. It just seems that no one can get through to her. I live in a constant state of fear for her and the thought that I will most likely end up burying my own child fills me with anguish. There's also the element of shame, which makes the subject hard to discuss. I always wonder if there was something that I could have done differently - or something that I could do now that I haven't thought of. I appreciate your kind words more than you could ever know.
Bless you, I kind of know how you feel. I have a son that is in prison now and has been in and out since the age of 17 and he is now 35. I have struggled with him and drugs, alcohol (which was the real first culprit) seems that started it all. I have tried to remind myself too that I am a good mother and that he will change. This time he has devoted much of his time to the Bible and learning more about God. Try to remind yourself that you are a good mother and sometimes although we hate to do it we must let go of our children after we have tried and tried, and let God work with them. Just pray, pray, and pray that God will do his will with them and direct them so they will see that drugs are just the work of the devil and are here to destroy her and her relation with him. Being able to talk to other Moms that are experiencing problems with their children will help you too. At least you will know you are not the only one and maybe you can find some different ways of thinking about your situation. I would love to be able to tell you what you could do, but, I can't. I will be your friend and will listen to you if you need one. Just email me. Good luck, and God Bless!
This note may be a little late, I just found your note but what I have to say, never goes out of date. Several years ago, I was where you are now, with a daughter of mine. Its' terribly hard to do this, but you have to let go-(and praying all the while)and let her go as far as she will go until she hits Rock-Bottom on her own!When she senses that you are (Truly) fed up and no longer catering to her every whim, she will decide to do what you have tried to teach her all along. suzi
