Message 337 of 595

old biker joke

A man riding his Harley was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, 'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.

The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.' The Lord said, 'Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.'

The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, 'Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a Woman truly happy.'

The Lord replied, 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge?
HarleyFXLR's profile
Replies 1 - 10 of 39
Calvin had ridden his bike to work that day on a perfect summer day with sun and warm temps, that afternoon as it was almost time to punch out a front came through and it got cold and rainy.
Calvin hated to get his chest wet and knew he would be cold in a hurry and knew that the zipper in front would leak water through so he got the bright idea to reverse his leather jacket and put the zipper in the back, which he did.
The ride home was going well until he hit one area where oil was on the road and went down hard knocking him out cold.
well the local volunteer ambulance dept. picked him up and delivered him to the hospital emergency dept., after doing their paper work and on the way out stopped and asked the ER doctor how he was.
the ER doctor told them "he'd have been fine if you hadn't turned his head around and killed him "
rbn5051's profile

4 months ago
LOL...you guys are too funny. Thanks for sharing.
imabusy's profile

4 months ago
hey Ima,we can thank each other,because of us,they are building a bridge,we can ride to the islands!!!
alaskamommabear's profile

4 months ago
You got that right AMB....LOL
imabusy's profile

4 months ago
its gonna be a small 2 lane bridge , each lane only 4 feet wide , 1 lane going each direction.
HarleyFXLR's profile

4 months ago
works for me,in the middle of winter when it 40 below,this old gal will WALK!!! lolo
alaskamommabear's profile

4 months ago
with gas stops along the way ??
rbn5051's profile

4 months ago
Never tried to ride in 40 below .
Don't think I'd want to.
My coldest was a 450 mile round trip ( ground pounder ) at 22 f .
I will NOT ever do that again.
Dropped the scoot in parking lot 6 blocks from the house because I could not move my legs.
And of course we'll have gas stations for bikes only every 250 miles on the new bridge, as well as free coffee .
HarleyFXLR's profile

4 months ago
oh NO!!! I dont ride a bike in any temps below 40 ..I dont even like riding my snowmachine when its that cold,unless I have to..I was meaning when its -40,a bridge to a warm island sounds so good,I would walk..
alaskamommabear's profile

4 months ago
Last year we did a short 100 mile run from Houston to our fav biker bar in 37 degree weather...we had heated seats...my butt was warm and toasty...the top of my legs however were frozen and numb...It was horrible...we laugh at it now...but i don't think I ever want to do that again without heated pants or something....
GingerAnnette's profile

4 months ago
Replies 1 - 10 of 39