SURVIVORS OF VIOLENT CRIME

Got to support my girl since I have been with her throughout this ordeal. And we just lost an old friend last month in a similar traumatic manner while he was working in Africa. Violence is rampant everywhere.

sorry, i meant 2 post my msg here. but i'm glad 2 be invited here

Ellie

I certain hope that the man who did this is finally convicted and kept in prison for what he did.
I am by no means trying to defend my son. He is guilty he has never denied that.
He recieved 2 capitol life sentences, and will be elligable for parole in the year 2082. He will be 40 years old in Sept.

Because I go to visit him as often as I can (about every 3 months), my other children 2 sons and 1 daughter no longer speak to me.
I will tell you the whole horrible story the next time I post.
It is after midnight and I have to go to work at 6:00 A.M.
Thank you
for being willing to listen

Again, this is hard on everyone. Lord knows there's enough blame to go around in just about everything that we do.

Most unfortunate about this is that it tears apart whatever family you have left. My husband's family (mother, father, sisters, brother) didn't speak to me for years after the murder because of things that they didn't know or understand about my marriage and circumstances surrounding the murder. We lived in separate states and, well, no one was wrong. Death just brings out the worst in people.

No matter what your son did, you carried him under your heart for 9 months. People don't understand that connection between a mother and child. And there's an added connection between a mother and son. I have one of each and, although my daughter has always been a magnificent child, she was more independent at birth whereas my son stayed my "baby" for a lot longer time than she did. He had to have a pacifer but she didn't. She moved to her own crib and room at one month while he slept on my stomach until he was just too long (and heavy) to fit. I tried breast-feeding with her but she wasn't interested. But I had my son between semesters of law school and had to return to class when he was 10 days old. So my milk was dried up on the delivery table while he was trying to suckle at my breast. He just didn't get it. Poor thing! That's boys for you. So you are supposed to visit your baby. I know that you are probably blaming yourself for his choices in life, thinking that you did something wrong somewhere. But this is a different world - not like when we were growing up. Too many outside influences. Too much glamorization of crime. My kids were raised around rap music because that's how I paid the bills. But I never allowed them to believe or think for one minute that was the way to get over. Their father and I had been in the music business for years and rap was just another genre. We made sure that they listened to it all - gangster rap, consciousness rap, Christian rap - so that they could get an understanding of what each represented. They made their own choices about the kind of music that they like to listen to and they chose old school R&B! The same genre that their father performed and recorded! Now they both have super "square" jobs, not in entertainment like their folks.

Isn't it funny how kids who have lawyers for fathers want to be musicians and kids who have musicians for parents choose ANYTHING else as a career? Who knows how to gauge these kids anymore. All we can do is hope and pray and love them, regardless of what happens.

You don't have a baby to throw him away when he does something wrong. Even if it's the worse thing that he could do in jurisprudence. Your son is still your son. And you hurt just like the victim's family hurts. And that statement about at least you can touch and see your child just doesn't hold water for me. You can't invite him over for family dinner or dress up to walk in the church as "Mother Of The Bride". He can't bring you a armful of wildflowers hand picked for your birthday. People don't think this completely out before they make statements which sound good in theory but don't work in practice.

So many lives wasted.....

YOU KNOW YOU'RE ONE BAD LADY. THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME TO THE GROUP. UNTIL LATER . LOL

PEACE!!!

My ex husband was shot in Columbus, GA 5 times while I was 6 months pregnant with my youngest son (he wasn't my ex husband at the time). I had to literally call and tell the police where he was while my husband's life was in between with all the surgeries. He hasn't been the same since and this was 17 years ago on June 1st. When they finally caught the guy, by him calling them from NJ and laughing at them cuz they couldn't find him (idiot, they trace calls). They gave him 5 years and he was out in less then 3 for good behavior. First thing he did when he got out was call my husband and tell him he WOULD finish the job. Luckily he hasn't, but that is still no way to live a life. I refused to live there and relocated to TN. I would NOT live my life in fear for myself, spouse or children. So I understand where you are coming from and commend you for not letting it sit on the back burner! Seems like some of the police force in GA are sleeping sometimes. I still believe the old tales of Macon County, etc.... Sad, but true!