Our 4th of July began with a professional fireworks show on the 3rd. Sponsored by the SERTOMA club, this was the eleventh year. A community choir was on hand to sing patriotic and religious songs.

To start the night off, the choir sang the national anthem. Everyone stood, who could stand. Some put their hands over their hearts. My son asked "where's the flag". There was none. So, my son - aged 16 and a Boy Scout - did not put his hand over his heart. My husband, also a scouter, put his hat over his heart.

I stood in admiration of these two men. No one told my son he had to salute during the Star Spangled Banner. I thought of Barack Obama and past President George H. W. Bush neither of whom saluted when the national anthem was played. There is protocol that when no flag is present, people should act as if the flag were present. But is my son less supportive of this country because he didn't follow the protocol? Is my husband more patriotic because he did cover his heart?

Usually, my heart swells with pride at the sound of the national anthem. But on the 3rd, I found myself, saddened and disenchanted with where my country is. Tears came to my eyes as I remembered all that our nation has fought to keep - integrity, freedome of speech, freedom of the press, freedom from search and seizure - and realizing some or most of those concepts had been trampled in the name of patriotism.

The Mariam-Webster online dictionary defines patriotism as "love for or devotion to one's country." The word came into use around 1726.The definition for patriot is "one who loves his or her country and supports its authority and interests." The word patriot came into use in 1605. The etymology is French, Latin and Greek with a general meaning of "father". Patriotic is defined as "inspired by patriotism" or "befitting or characteristic of a patriot."

During the protests for and against Vietnam, one of the statements in support was "America. Love it or Leave it." The premise being if one protested against one's country, then one was less than patriotic and certainly showed no patriotism. Ironically, those who protested against the war believed themselves to be patriotic.

I understand what has happened and, to some degree, why it has happened - this trampling of rights in the name of patriotism. In times of chaos and fear, we've always reacted with a tighter rein on civil liberties. World War II we took Japanese Americans and put them in concentration/re-settlement camps. We've paid people to destablize other countries - in the name of patriotism - Nicaragua and El Salvador are examples.

Must I support my government even when it is morally and ethically wrong? I suppose the answer depends on what I consider moral and ethical. It also depends on how others define those terms. Are we, as a nation, so divided that nothing can bring reconciliation or common ideals?

As I watched my husband and my son shoot off fireworks on the 4th, I remembered other 4th of July nights. When I was my son's age, it was easier to support the government - Johnson's great society was a monumental event.

"Love for or devotion to one's country." It is easy to love when things are going my way. It is difficult when things are bad. I love my country. I do not like the current president or his policies. I support the constitutional form of government this Republic has. I do not support the waving of that constitution.

I consider myself a patriot. I pledge my allegiance to the flag and to the Republic for which it stands. I pledge my allegiance to the Constitution of this Republic. Patriotism is not reflected in "love it or leave it." I will look for the stars and strips waving in the dawn's early light; and I will know that my country is still here.