WHAT HAPPENED TO KINDNESS?

posted 2 months ago, updated about 1 month later

This is about feeling sad that I came to eons almost a year ago, after leaving another social site that people wrote and said very mean, cruel and hurtful things to each other. I have seen many people leave eons this month for having values, and passions. They have been written to and threatened in pms. I had a friend doing a wonderful story that was just beautiful and made into a blog and people wrote the member and made that member cry. I have another friend leaving eons tonight because of getting hate mail. What does that say about our members here at eons? I love eons, and have recommended this site to many. I am wondering what do I tell people now? I know it is not most of eons that writes people and threatens them, but the ones that are doing it are hurting the ones that want to have fun and share and care about each other. I am losing friends and it hurts. It hurts me even for those who feel the need to this. Why? Why Be so mean spirited? I imagine I will get hate mail over this blog, but before you do, think about this, have I or anyone else here at eons hurt you? Is your anger just something your taking out on others? Remember, in the end what goes around comes around. I hope if you have written someone here at eons and hurt them that you have the guts to take back the pain you caused and say "I am sorry". I want the caring eons I have grown to love back.



Thanks to all who have replied to this blog..I wanted to add this song

Comments

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1. 2 months ago ChefJan wrote:

Great Blog Ladylake. I have been a victim of these people in the past. What I have learned is blow them off completely. Don't let their anger and disgust effect you or your reason for being here. Sooner or later the Eon's Staff will nail this group of mean-spirited people and kick them to the curb. In the meantime, enjoy your life here and surround yourself with the best people in the Community. The majority of active members are pretty terrific people.

2. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

Thanks for your reply. I don't know who they are, but they do. I believe everyone can be kind, and isn't that what we are all here for? We are a boomer community, wanting to reach out to others and receive love and friendship, not hate mail and threats. I pray people think after reading this before they start typing. I am not pointing fingers at anyone person, only asking people to look within themselves and ask if kindness would not be a better way to respond, than writing mean things to people to make them feel badly?

3. 2 months ago juanita1 wrote:

Why leave. Block them and report them.

4. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

I guess people I have heard from just got tired of getting hurt. I am hurt for them.

5. 2 months ago Naiche wrote:

I too have been a victim of hate on eons. We ended up blocking them on that site and on others. Naiche

6. 2 months ago NoHiddenMeaning wrote:

I am also troubled by the same issues that you have written so well about. And I have lost friends who didn't feel that it was in their best interest to bare the brunt of the angry messages directed toward them. Some of the friends I've seen hurt were among the most active and positive forces in Eons and their absence is a loss to us all. I do not understand why people have the need to expect everyone else to feel as they do, or the lack of compassion to allow for individual differences. The diversity which makes Eons a special place should be embraced and celebrated...never denigrated. I have posted this "Code of Compassion" on my profile page and would consider the world a better place if all of us were to live by it. You'll never get hate mail from me, LL...only appreciation for being the special person that you are. Cheers~ Sharon

7. 2 months ago justaSeeker wrote:

It is a shame that people have to lash out at one another. I suppose that somehow it makes them feel big, to belittle another.
I've never understood the concept of being mean, myself, it seems like such a waste.

Richard (aka: ~Seeker)

8. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

I appreciate the comments, and if only the ones who are doing this, would think before they write, or take the time to say they are sorry I believe all at eons are kind enough to forgive and move on. Random acts of Kindness and Compassion I hope is our new motto here at eons! I am not saying I have never hurt someone without thinking about what I wrote and if I have I am sorry, but I am big enough to say if I ever have, right here and now, I am sorry, and I hope if you, whoever you are, have been writing hate mail or threatening others you rethink your behavior and say you are sorry too!

9. 2 months ago Akicita wrote:

This is a wonderful blog my Dear and people have no reason to send you hate mail over it, but then, who knows anymore. Sure we can block them and turn them into eons, but the damage is done and their friends will just continue to get even. I know of one that was kicked off and his/her friends came back with revenge. Sometimes it is better to just move on and leave such hate behind. I for one have more serious issues to face then to continue fighting these childish issues. I have always been a lover and not a fighter so chaulk one up for the enemy. It just hurts me deep to lose what I feel is my family here. God's speed to all of you. You know who yopu are. To those others out here. What goes around, comes around. Your day will come. Your saying above is true to a point, but I gave my heart to everyone, and got only a hand full back.

10. 2 months ago aarped wrote:

I have never experienced the sad behavior that you've written about. I can't imagine that as sweet-spirited as you are that anyone would take offense to you. I think it's a shame that some people choose to be impolite simply because they don't have to look into your eyes while thry hurt you; or maybe some people are just quick to judge in any circumstance. I hope that it's a very few who behave this way and that you and others who have been victimized will report it to Eons. I'm with you all the way!

11. 2 months ago happymawmaw wrote:

I feel better now after reading your blog.. earlier I wrote one almost like yours. At first I thought I was the only one who can feel the "sadness" here.. I've had enough sadness and even though I don't want anymore.. I know it will come again. Even that makes me sad!! I was going to stay away from Eons for awhile.. but I have commitments and need to keep them. Thank you so much for your blog.. prayerfully we will feel better about things here at Eons soon. I can't be around "negative" things for long.. it attachs itself to us and little by little it will push us away from ourselves..
I found this saying and was looking for a place to post it.. hope you don't mind.. God bless..June


Quotes

12. 2 months ago cloudyblue wrote:

Well LL and all, I feel bad that there are those who feel the need to belittle others. We know they are around. We can choose how we respond to them. WWJD What would Jesus do? I think we need to block them and use Sharon's Code of Compassion and get on with ourselves. Being with those we care about and enjoy. We can not change anything they will or will not do. We can only change our response to them. Again. If they are ignored what more can they do? Block them and don't tuck our tails between our legs and run. They win that way. Get on with what we enjoy and why we are on this site. Do not give them the power over your actions! You have that power, not them.

13. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

This is a song I always loved by Lulu, it called ''PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN YOUR HEART". I thought of it after writing this blog and I hope all here at eons listen. Let's put a little love in our heart. Blessings, LL

14. 2 months ago UNIQUETRESS wrote:

i too have been hurt very badly on eons but i refuse to run, i love it here and i love all of you, you keep doing what you do, and dont let haters get the best of you, small petty people dont know what it is like to give or receive love, or help, that old saying dont bite the hand that feeds you, sounds like a whole bunch of wanna bes to me, god bless you LL you are a wonderful lady.

15. 2 months ago Iloveart wrote:

Isn't there a way to forward that kind of mail to the Eons administrators and have them work it out?
I would say, do not respond, notify an administrator, and your moderators, but DO NOT RESPOND to these people. If there is no fuel, there can be no fire.

16. 2 months ago MissPepr wrote:

I have been a victim of this mean spriitness. I, however, stand up to them. I know I should not do that, but my primary theme in life is justice. I can not stand to see injustices done to people!

The woman you spoke of in your blog received many positive postings and PM from members of the group. That really made me feel more powerful than confronting the meanies. Sending positive energy is always better than sending negative energy.

Thank you LL for writing this blog. I hope the people who want to leave EONS will change their minds and stay. It always hurts to loose good people.

Blessings for you and yours
Sher

17. 2 months ago Debirae wrote:

Unfortunately some people feel that they can hide behind their computers and just strike out at anyone and everyone, forgetting that behind these monitors are real people with REAL feelings.

I dislike name calling, being hurtful, hateful, you name it. To me there is no reason for this type of thing to happen, however we cannot always have things like we may want. We can't control those who are bitter, angry at the entire world, and so unhappy in their own lives, that if they see someone else happy, or doing something they wish they were doing all they can do is to do anything to rain on the feelings of someone else.

I wish we could round all the "miserable" people up who try to hurt others and send them somewhere, but I speak my mind, or I block them, but I will not be run off Eons by anyone who strikes out at me.

Great blog, don't let them get to you, and rise above it all, we can only hope that those we all liked and miss who recently left will come back, until then I shall enjoy the memories of the fun times we had, and wish them the best.

18. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

I need to clarify, I have not had them to be mean to me as of yet, well in a off the wall way, but more so to many I know as good friends, and some I just read about in blogs and groups, and booms. I probably will hear from them after this blog. I hope instead they take this negative energy and turn it into positive energy for all at eons, and themselves too.

19. 2 months ago ABWONTHELOOSE wrote:

I just want to add my two cents to the many compliments this blog has received. Thank you for having the courage to speak out, knowing it may have sad reprecussions. Thank you for your kind, giving, compassionate, forgiving, loving heart. You really are very appreciated. Your life has more than your share of pain, and yet you continue to reach out with love, comfort, and support. That's an inspiration to all of us!

20. 2 months ago celmira9 wrote:

I think this is the reason why so many individuals are living alone these days. It just seems everywhere we turn there is injustice, meaness, selfishness. In the face of all this we must be strong and endeavor to find good in people. This is just another example of man's inhumanity to man. We must be strong in order to be happy.

21. 2 months ago gjo1 wrote:

In this so called world of compassion and acceptance-we find out truly who our cyber friends are. Most of the people with the sour notes are the ones that you do not see on their profiles as who they really are, they choose to become something or someone in an alter ego, look at the ones you refer to-do they have a real pic of themselves??
There have been many people blocked from my site and I have chosen to make my profile private, why?? because there are too many people out there that just look for trouble and think that by being something they are not will make them feel more secure in their actions. Bullies live in every realm of the universe-mean spirited people look for something they can sink their teeth into because they are insecure!!
Jealousy runs rampant, I have chosen to quit many sites as they have become a competition to one up each other.
There is a site I am on and you have to show your real self on your profile. I would like all those people who have such disdain and hurtfulness to come over to a site where real people are and see how far they would get. This is not a threat, but an observation of the true sense of self.
You are a true survivor LL and with that comes peace and a sense of worth. If people tok the time to read other peoples sites before forming opinions, they just might step back and see themselves.

Move forward and forget the little people, live is too short.

Your blog is very enlighting and maybe just one person will see the things they have done and undo them, is it too late people??? It is up to you to decide.

Anger is a feeling we allow ourselves to feel-not me-just another perspective of the realities of Life.

22. 2 months ago MarketMama wrote:

There has been a core of very active eons members who actually follow people around to different groups and pick on them. They research their victims comments on other groups and then use those quotes out of context to dig at them. Then righteously scold others for using their tactics. It's so high school that I wonder if these folks ever really grew up.

Of course the daily news and history makes it clear that as a species humans can be viciously cruel.

23. 2 months ago RoxannaDanna wrote:

I've never understood why people take so much to heart things that are posted on the internet. I've never understood why so many people think that what they post on the internet is pure nuggets of gold. I've never understood people who sit in front of a computer and post vile, hateful things to complete strangers. Somehow, it must make them feel really good about themselves, but I can't imagine how.

24. 2 months ago lostinatlanta wrote:

I am so sorry that you have experienced the ugly side of life. I think that some people are just unhappy (miserable) and they want everyone else to be unhappy too. People who have been hurt in the past or hold anger and bitterness can be extremely difficult to deal with. Instead of feeding their negativity, the best thing we can all do is "let it go." Realize that this isn't personal because the person behind the ugliness doesn't even know you. It is their issue, not yours. There are many kind and beautiful people on Eons who only want to enjoy their Eons groups and friends and I hate to see them leave because someone who is mean spirited or negative says hurtful things. Let's say a prayer for those that are hurting and hope that they will eventually find joy and peace for themselves.

25. 2 months ago ddskdmom wrote:

Unfortunately the world we are living in has alot of cruelty. Just watch the news and listening to the politians all you here is negativity. And some people let that carry over into their treatment of people. I find that I smile when people are cruel and say a prayer for them because they are not happy people inside...I am and when someone says hurtful things and give them back love and peace....I am a happy person and I will never let someone else control that...This world needs everyone giving love and peace...

26. 2 months ago itsabeautifulday wrote:

I say, change what you can of this world, and walk away from what you cannot. Love and compassion is needed in so many directions from those who wish to give it. If you are one of the loving people, rise above the cruelty and ignorance of the petty who would hurt you for their own small satisfaction, and let them wallow in their own anger and self-hatred. Waiting for an apology only prevents you from moving to a more positive place - like, in the company of compassionate others who also wish to elevate the level of our humanity through non-agression.

27. 2 months ago NoHiddenMeaning wrote:

28. 2 months ago lakelady53 wrote:

REALLY GOOD SAYING NMH!!! :)

29. 2 months ago jeanie52 wrote:

I have never had anyone be mean to me here, yet. Some may say that I was mean to someone today though.
I read a blog posted by a woman in a group I was in. SHe and I had talked before and I had a lot of compassion for her and her problem, she and I had a lot of the same things happen to us in life.
But in her last blog she said she knew of child abuse, that she witness it herself.
A lot of people advised her to something about it. After she had gotten 5 or 6 replies she wrote a blog in which she addressed each person who had replied.
In the blog she tried to back off of what she had told us, saying we had tried to put ourselves into her life, and that things were not as bad as we had made it seem.
All of us had given her the same advise based on her words, but she said we were wrong.
This was not the first time she had blogged about how bad things were and we all tried to comfort her, and give her sound advice.
But today I could not over look that a child had been abuse and I came down hard on her for over looking it. This was only after my third attempt to reason with her about the danger. She said she only wrote to vent not to be judged.
Anyway the manager of the group defended her by saying we should all be supportive of her.
I had been supportive until she appeared to try to cover up the abuse because we all talked openly to her about it.
I can't support abuse of a child so I left the group, but I did tell her that it sicken me to know what she was covering it up.
If that is mean then I'm guilty I guess of standing up to abuse.