Bipolar! What is it? We hear of people suffering from bipolar but exactly what is it? Some say that it has to do with mood swings, from high to low. Everyone suffers from mood swings at some time or another. Bipolars have extreme mood swings. From extreme highs where they may feel like they can do anything, spend money they do not have, talk excessively, quick to lose their temper and ready to fight,to extreme lows. Depression sets in and all energy is drained, wants to sleep constantly, loses interest in everything, excludes themselves from others.

For years my son suffered from bipolar without anyone recognizing what was wrong. He has always had good jobs and made good money. Therefore, he has had good credit rating and was able to trade cars, boats, jetskies, and motorcycles. The best of everything. Then when the payments begin to start, depression sets in because he has a hard time meeting these bills.

Relationships come and go, good jobs are hard to keep, friends were falling away. He was using drugs and alcohol. This went on for twenty five years. He lived alone and we probably didn't know all of the problems he was having.

The year it came to a head, he began to call me and complaining that it was hard for him to go to work. He could not get up in the mornings. Not realizing what he was going through, I told him he needed to work because of all the bills he had. He was forced to leave his jobs because of his mood swings, not because of his work.

He had a parental suit filed against him. He was so sure that this was not true. He began to receive letters from the woman's lawyer. However, DNA test proved the twins were his. My son became so depressed that he went to bed and did not get up. He could not handle the pressure. He tried to commit suicide four times within three months. He did not have a job or insurance and each time was sent to a state hospital. He would improve for a short while, then become worse. I finally convinced him to let me go with him to his doctor so we could get to the bottom of his problem.

Some friends at church asked me could he be bipolar. I researched all I could on this disorder and was convinced he was bipolar because of his past experiences. When I mentioned this to his doctor, he said, "I asked you before if you might be bipolar and you said no". I told the doctor that he should have diagnosed him as bipolar without asking a patient because this one did not know what bipolar was. He gave him so many drugs that my son seemed drugged constantly. He slept all the time and had suicidal thoughts when awake.

We changed doctors and this one took him off all medication which was as bad. He attempted suicide again. While in a Behavioral Center, another doctor treated him. This doctor was trained specifically with bipolars. This suicide attempt was a blessing in disguise. He is now on just one medication but having to see the doctor regularly because when his mood changes, he will have to add more medication. The longest he has gone in feeling good is six months.

I have lived with him for approximately four years and have seen him mania and depressed. I have fought for him to get disability because he was unable to work. His girls are a blessing to the family and he gets them every other weekend. The mother is good to let us have them when we want them. They are in school now so we have to work around their school program. The girls have been an inspiration for my son but he cannot be alone with them. I have to be with him when the girls come. Sometimes because of his moods, we will not get the girls. The mother understands this.

My mother worries that I might be in danger. However, if I feel any danger, I would leave immediately. Most of the time, he appreciates me being here. I think he is afraid to be by himself. He has been feeling pretty good lately and wants me to leave because he feels like I am controlling his life. However, he cannot have control over his money because of his spending habits. I explain to him I am trying to get him to the point that he will not have to depend on me. His mood could change at any time and he would need me. It worries me sometimes, what will happen to him if anything happens to me. My older son and daughter would not be able to deal with him.

Bipolar is not an easy disorder to treat. Its one of the hardest illnesses to treat and its one of the most difficult mental illnesses for a family to deal with. Some people respond fine to medication and can live a normal life. But more often than not, others have a hard time finding the right medication to help them. The longer it takes to diagnosis bipolar, the harder it is to treat.

People mean well but do not understand what you are dealing with. They think you can think positive or read your Bible, or depend on God and not the medication. My son has had well meaning friends to say this to him. This can be devastating to a mentally ill person. It is tempting for them to come off their medication.

There are 5.7 million American adults who suffer from bipolar disorder. Depression is understood in our society but mania is often misunderstood. All bipolars act differently and respond differently to medication. The top of the pole is extreme mania, the bottom is expreme depression. The middle of the pole is the baseline. Some people have wave lengths that aren't very high. Some might have extreme mania but not extreme depression.

Our doctor advised us to read all we could on the disorder. I went to the internet, bought books, read newspaper articles, anything I could get my hands on. I have saturated my mind with trying to understand this mental illiness. I don't think doctors understand it fully.

It has affected our family because I am unable to spend as much time with my husband, my grandchildren, and my older son and daughter. They resent this because all of them enjoy spending time with me. My husband has been very understanding. The only time he gives me any problem is when it comes to the money.

I have gone through my 401K and my savings trying to save his house for him. It has affected our income because we have to help with his utilities and groceries. We are unable to travel like we had planed. The night we were to leave on a cruise with several couples from the church, my son tried to commit suicide and I had to cancel the trip. We lost our money because we had already paid for the cruise and we did not buy the insurance. Another cruise was planned and we sent our first payment but found out later that the insurance would not pay except for certain things. I had to ask for a refund in order not to lose our money.

Before I was living with him, when we traveled, I called him every day to make sure he was doing ok because of his behavior. I worried constantly while on a trip because I could not get back to him if something happened.

But you know, God has given me strength and love and I am able to deal with this problem. I have people around me that love me, many friends who pray for me and a good friend who has a son with a mental disorder also. She and I talk a lot because we have so much in common and we know that we both understand what the other is going through.

I have to keep reminding my mother and brother that I have the joy in my heart and the peace that God will see us through this difficulty. I receive a blessing when my son is in a good frame of mind and I know that God is with me when he goes into depression. He will give me the wisdom I need to handle this.

Our hope is that we will find the right medication and the doctor's goal is to keep him in a normal mood for at least two years. Bipolar is a lifelong struggle. You never have it licked. Medication may work for a period of time but can all of sudden stop working and you have to start over again.

There is a lot of research on bipolar and new medication is coming out regularly.

Be supportive of anyone who has bipolar. Do not criticize. They are unable to take criticism or handle change. Be there for their caregiver and support them. Most of all, love them and let them know it.