So one evening a couple days later I started flipping through this book as I was watching my regular Monday night TV dribble and I started finding myself giggling and getting more intrigued with the character possibilities for my holey and discarded footwear. Not only were scary monsters and little green spacemen part of the scenario, but I started envisioning a whole community of distorted and hilarious movie star and political figure make overs. Pretty soon my imagination was running wild. There I was listening to another ‘news’ commentator babble on about Britney Spears and her latest escapade while I was imagining my sock puppets turning into “Slut Girl” and “Bone Head Betty.”
Hmm . . . maybe the heal of my one, lone, red, white and blue stripped sockaroonie could turn into a Bushy Boy character. You know, button eyes too close together, crooked mouth, big ears and pointing one, self-righteous finger. Or how about a scary faced Cheney creature that I could name Hal (last name Li Burton)? Maybe it could have a big, pork barrel belly with an Enron logo stitched onto its chest. Or perhaps I could create the all time ridiculous, “Denial Larry ” doll - a lavender sock figure with big blue felt eyes and a wide stance, picking up toilet paper. Could be a real seller in Idaho.
Anyway, the next day I started stitching together my frayed sock visions when suddenly a whole new community of Hollywood starlets and political figures started to emerge. It was a riot! Pieces of useless piles of scrap material and miscellaneous buttheads, I mean buttons transformed into a whole community of polyester converts. Hysterical, woe be gone little aliens were re-stitched into a whole new world order. I was their creator, their ruler! It was wonderful. If I wanted Slut Girl to reform, I just sewed together a Hillary outfit and transformed her into a Woodstock Baby Boomer; if I wanted Denial Larry to come out of the closet, that was easy, too. Sew a button earring on his left earlobe, give him a rainbow flag and stick out his little pinky finger. And my Hal Li Burton monster? Well, it became a Barack Obama look-alike with yarn dreadlocks. I was the Commander and Chief of this new left-wing community and I didn’t have to kiss babies and give away illegal contracts to succeed.
So here I am, one week later, celebrating with my new Democratic party friends and I couldn’t be happier. No more stupid Bushy Boys and Hal Li Burtons to deal with. And guess what? The Sock Creatures are a big hit! Orders are coming in faster than I can move my little needle. I now have back orders for “Coming Out Ma Ma,” “Al Gorgeous,” and “Oop Rah Rah.” It’s a whole new world order…….. One stitch at a time!
