Was I surprised to hear on national news that my school system had a major school shooting today? Not really. Having worked in this district for 25+ years, I have affirmed that pushing things under the rug and repressing information on incidents at the school level would only create a volatile situation that could later erupt like this has. It is truly fortunate that it wasn't worse and more people weren't killed.

The "shooter" as they refer to him, was a 14 yr. old. bipolar kid who was in my husband's Science class last year. That's a year older than my grandson. He was a special education student (SED, Severe Emotional Disturbance). Not a clue how he got into this 'alternative' school.

These alternative schools in Cleveland are traditionally for the bad kids. They are more like 'Welcome Back Cotter' schools (remember the sweat hogs)? They name their schools "Academies" or associate them with other vague references to 'success and excellence' to make these Magnet schools schools sound more appealing and to try to keep the flood of students from leaving the district because the schools are so deplorable. It's all about PR. There are no schools here that have high standards. All you have to do is look at and listen to how they speak on national news to see these are NOT 'gifted' students. I heard the 'F'bomb make it on the air uncut, as clear as day this afternoon by one of the 'Success Tech' students.

How was this suspended student even in the school in the first place? Don't we owe the students and teachers/staff who come to school on a daily basis some sense of safety? That is a primary need!

Our local news is more scripted but even still, if you look between the lines and listen to the parents, you can hear the real story. Parents are screaming that security is lacking and a parent group came out with suggestions at the beginning of the year to have security guards at the site. Metal detectors are at the Administration building not where the kids are. Our superintendent makes the big bucks while metal detectors are on the back burner because of the expense involved.

I am appalled that not one mental health professional has come out and commented on the dead child or offered any advice on what to do to spot problems like this before they get into this critical phase. I called two agencies and got absolutely no support for our teachers and community. The politics of it is sickening!

We have dropped the ball on helping this seriously mentally ill child. They knew he was bipolar; he was in a special class last year. Where was his support? His Special Ed. teacher used to send him into my husband's class because he was able to talk to him. How did this High School not know his needs, especially since it is such a small school? What has happened to IDEA? We'll see what our Friday Teachers' Professional Development brings.

The kid was a Goth, blue fingernails and a long black trench coat. He was extremely intelligent but his logic was off because of his mental health issues. He is being vilified in the press here and I am sure, although it will never get into the news, that bullying and race had a lot to do with it. He was white in an almost 100% black/Hispanic school. When I offered two Bullying workshops in my school district and had world renown speakers address teachers about workplace bullying and bullying in the schools among the students. I was told bullying wasn't a problem in Cleveland. I am seriously thinking of making my husband retire after this year. He told me he has already disarmed two students in previous years.

How can we say we care for children and allow a tragedy like this to occur without asking some serious questions and demanding some real answers? I am sick to my stomach listening to the PR being pushed on the air. Everyone has the right words to say and nothing important is being said! I only hope in the days to come, I will hear some real dialogue about this topic that will answer some of these important and timely questions.

What a tragic day! I pray for the families of those involved in this calamitous event and for the leadership to step up to the plate and make appropriate and substantial changes.

A postscript. Sent by his teacher from last year.

"Today was a bad day. You just cannot get around that fact. A student that I taught, went to school and shot other students and teachers, and eventually took his own life.
The media would have you believe that he was heartless. He was a monster. He was....etc. Yet, to me he was a student.

I cannot word how I feel right now. For Asa and I shared many conversations about the world and about a brighter future for himself. He was trying hard to overcome the things in life that troubled him. He shared everything with me and as he was candid about his feelings, he trusted me with his most guarded thoughts. He was not a violent person. His records at Gallagher would reflect that he was suspended once or twice for the whole year. His myspace page reflects a student that was not concern with his own being, but the rights and the freedom of others. He studied Noam Chomsky, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King and read Shakespeare and wrote Haiku's. The media does not reflect the struggles that he pushed through to learn how to spell but yet he read on a eleventh grade level. They have yet mention that he was the 1st Board Chess Champ for the entire Cleveland Metropolitan School District or his high scores on the OAT and Cleveland Benchmark Exam.

They mentioned his home troubles. They mentioned his probation. They mentioned his attitude.

As I pen this, my words fall short and my diction is bankrupt, when it comes to accurately explaining my lost. You see, I talked to Asa regularly. I am his first friend on his myspace page. He often called me. He thanked me for helping him get into Success Tech. He thanked me for helping him control his behavior which helped him get off probation. He told me that I changed his life.

I struggle to believe that now, but I hold fast that it is true. For it was the last thing that he told me face to face three weeks ago.... and it is all I have to go on teaching."