Culturally, I have one sense of self as in who I am, where I've been and where I'd like to go within the context of what surrounds me. Spiritually, I have another sense of self that is bolstered by reflection, thought and meditation. Emotionally, there is the me that needs, wants and desires to give and receive love, kindness, respect, and attention. It has taken a long time to shape these aspects of "self". The journey began in the explorations of the 60's and never stopped since. I have both shaped and allowed to be shaped my sense of self on all spheres of being. Every thought and experience was added to the recipe of who I am. The hardest part has been to realize that and continue growing.

The part of self that is mundane and fits the social spectrum is my least favorite. It represents all sorts of compromise and sacrifice of who I am on other levels. It's the self of me as "husband", "parent", "employee" and what other roles that may be thrust upon me. I like to call this the oppressed self. It is oppressed because it is shaped by external demands and societal pressures. It is expected and critiqued and demanded and controlled. It wouldn't be a good thing for me to expose my spiritual self when confronted with a problem at work. "You know Charlie, that report is really screwing up my chi. You don't suppose I could take some time and meditate on this project and get back to you when I'm feeling more balanced?" I would imagine that after I was released from the local psych ward, my job would not be waiting for me with open arms.

My sense of self as it applies to spiritualism really isn't very disciplined. I tend to borrow from almost every major belief. After all, a good concept is universal. Contrary to the monotheists, one size does not fit all when it comes to my spiritual identity. There are some really wonderful and enlightening concepts that come from Paganism, the Hindu beliefs, Buddhism, Catholicism (I really like the beauty of the traditional mass and the incense) as well as what can be discovered in the Koran, Bhagavad Gita, and Shinto prayer. I am fascinated by the spirit world and transcendence. I like to take spiritual journeys while contemplating a tree or a rock. I enjoy moving the energy within me until it rests in a sublime place.

As to the emotional self, I see it as a bridge between the spiritual and the mundane. My emotions and awareness of other's emotions allow me to briefly drift into a world that exists somewhere between love and hate, fear and confidence, trust and betrayal. Mt emotional self is alway "on" and constantly absorbing the energies of human need. Ether the need to have or the need to give those energies that we call positive like love, kindness, encouragement and the like.

The whole idea behind self-realization is not to make your self "real" but to realize your "self"-that composite of many levels that describes the total "you". Of course I'm not an expert on this so I guess I should say that is how it all applies to me. I would be interested in hearing from others, what their self-realization entails.