The Latest Got To Have Ken Dolls

Tri-focal Ken:

He comes with standard and reading glasses that can be worn with the string hanging behind the neck. You can upgrade to hip looking frameless tri-focal glasses or for a 50% discount, get Ken with Half Frames for that sophisticated Walter Matthau look.

Heartburn Ken:

Feed him Barbie’s spaghetti and meat sauce, watch his belly distend and then give him a tiny antacid pill, wait ten minutes, and hear him pass gas as he falls asleep on the couch.

Viagra Ken:

He comes with his own prescription of Viagra, which he never uses, because he falls asleep on the couch every night.

Caddie Ken:

This is great looking Ken with thick glasses, jowls and a double chin that perfectly balances his pot belly and of course Ken’s very own Coup Deville that plays Led Zeppelin music when he puts it gear. Have hours of fun watching Ken driving around in his Caddie thinking he’s cool, and trying to impress girls younger than his own daughter.

Cardiac Ken:

This is the Ken everyone wants. He comes with his very own Medicaid card, a portable defibrillator and a tiny bottle of Nitro pills. He’s great fun after over-exercising, a fatty fried meal, and two packs of smokes. Watch him as he grabs his chest and keels over.

Git-her-done Ken:

This Ken is a classic. He comes dressed in dirty, greasy jeans with an oil soaked rag hanging from his back pocket, a wife-beater tee-shirt and filthy John Deer hat. You and your friends will have hours of fun watching Ken wax his dually Dodge pickup truck, drink lots of beer, urinate in his front yard and then spend the night abusing Barbie before he passes out in the trailer.