I studied for the Roman Catholic priesthood for 2 years in a major seminary...1975-1977.
My major was Moral and Spiritual Theology.
There was a window of opportunity at that time that shut and locked permanently.
It has taken me a few years…but….
I accept that.
I feel that the hierarchy of the church will never change it's attitude and it creates dogma and policy and deletes all others that are proposed without exception in relationship to the women's issues in particular.

Men in the clergy can be masters of rhetoric in carrying threats to their comfort zones and agitators of their fears to certain oblivion. They have a boiling point...a Seek and Destroy mechanism triggered by who knows what?
They do it like the wave of a wand...with the tenacity of a hummingbird, they flit from one subject to another and convince the populace they are misdirected, confused, under educated in the ways of heaven and do it in the most patronizing and degrading- (none-the-less)-charming and benevolent fashion of silky tones and fatherly smiles.

Be not deceived, the Holy Spirit is available in the church...but, there is evil a foot in the breezeways of the Vatican, the closets of the White House, the classrooms of schools, the halls of justice, the corridors of the business communities and so it goes.

Each individual who has eyes, to see or ears to hear or feelings to feel has to make choices.

"There are no small jobs, just small people", someone wrote.

The issue of women's priesthood was very big to me once.

I thought and prayed about issues and women's place and discernment over and over.
Then, I rationalized; God had something in mind when I heard a call to the priesthood.
I learned quite a bit.
I had an exceptional insider's view of the seminary life and studies, few Catholic women ever had.

I am grateful for the opportunities God has allowed me and challenges that have been gifted to me.

I am neither sullen nor angry.

Individuals have opportunities gifted them in time that contribute to their deeper understanding and knowledge and insight.

I HAD OPPORTUNITIES TO CONTINUE MY STUDIES THROUGH OTHER HALLS OF LEARNING.

I could have joined another religion that ordained women. I decided a job (the priesthood) was not more important than staying grounded in my faith and remaining Catholic despite disappointments.

Jewish brethren counseled me, that in my place as a non-uniformed member of the clergy or religious, I could do more good, move about in more places and be a hand of God that accepted or sanctioned officials could not.

It's not the collar, the robes, or the habit that make you special or "called".
It's not the laying on of hands that are the last or final or supreme confirmation.

It is through God's will that all circumstances and institutions exist.
God allows the human being free will and what we do with it and what we don’t –
Ultimately, we reap the harvest.

It is our internal calling that each individual must listen to and weed out the ego, the false self...the Parameters-self installed.... that we must reexamine.

We are the church!
I am a Christian.
I am a Child of Elohim.
These are my beliefs.

What are the priorities of your call?

Something must guide each of us.

I keep giving myself over and over again to God…to the Holy Spirit.
Hopefully, the little things I do, give up, say…whatever… are under Wisdom, Truth and Love’s guidance.

Well, God be praised!